Children biting - what we can do

Whether we like it or not, biting is very common in young children, and it is inevitable that when a group of young children play together that from time to time there will be a biter or two. But we recognise that this doesn’t make it any easier and the situation can be very upsetting for the children and families of both the child has been bitten and the biter, as well as the staff involved. It is important that we understand why biting happens and what to do when it does. 

Statistically, as with many other nurseries, we have very few biters, however when we do, we find that a child goes through a spell of biting for any number of reasons: 

·       To express emotions like anger, frustration, and fear, when vocabulary hasn’t been developed yet 

·       To gain attention 

·       In self defense if they feel threatened 

·       As an extension of natural curiosity- what happens if I do this to someone? 

·       As a satisfying a need for oral stimulation to self-regulate, relieve anxiety or cope with stressful situations.

It is developmental normal for children to bite from when they are babies and this can continue well into school life, but the most typical age for biting is toddlers, who are struggling to deal with big feelings and have insufficient vocabulary to express themselves verbally. 

Here at KatieB Kids we acknowledge this and have clear strategies to minimise incidents and ensure that staff are equipped to respond sensitively to incidents of biting in order to reduce the distress for all those involved. 

What can we do to reduce biting incidents? 

Biting can happen very quickly and with their being multiple reasons for why biting occurs, even with a range of strategies in place it is impossible to eliminate biting completely. However, gathering as much information about the child and the biting incidents as possible can really help us to plan strategies to support the child in question and help reduce further incidents. It is important to consider:

·       What are the child triggers?  What happened right before the biting? 

-        Does it always happen at a certain time of day e.g. meal times? 

-        Was the child arguing over a precious object such as a favoured toy?

-        Was the child upset or frustrated and unable to verbalise this?

·       The behaviour displayed, Was the biting the only expression of behaviour or did the child try and express themselves in another way before the bit?

·       What happened directly after the behaviour?

-        Did the child receive attention from a adult as a result of the behaviour?  

-        Was the child upset about what had happened? 

Good relationships with both children and their families are key. In line with our emotion coaching policy, we ensure that we have a good holistic understanding of each child which helps us to understand if a child has a pre-disposition to display unwanted behaviour such as biting for example a new sibling or family breakdown. 

What strategies can be put in place to support the child who bites? 

It is important that incidents of biting are dealt with ‘in the moment’ and that the biter receives as little attention as possible for the biting. Instead, some strategies that can be used are: 

·       Validate feelings and separate them from behaviours, all feelings and emotions are valid but all behviours are not! 

·       Having a member of staff support the child at times of the day which are triggering for the child e.g. sitting with them at lunch time. 

·       Provide a child with chew toys if they are identified as seeking oral stimulation 

·       Provide different outlets for children to express emotions e.g. hitting or biting a teddy or cushion in frustration or anger

Ultimately everyone involves wants the best for the children but sometimes we have to accept that developmental stages can play a huge role in how children behave and how likely these incidents are to occur. It is all part of growing up and learning to deal with other human beings and the world around them. It is about being resilient and bouncing back